Bloody Pink Fluffy Unicorn on a Slippy Rainbow !

What the hell ? except the absolute abuse? 

I actually don't really know what I am supposed to think about all of this. Somehow, I don't even really care. Just wondering to which part of my self it belongs. Is it part of this old me, the reckless and stupid June, doing stuff without thinking too much about the consequences, the young and fearless June? Or is it the new one, the all grown-up June with a rational mind and a temperant behaviour? 

I wouldn't say that this whole stuff is near temperance because it is surely way beyond reasonable, logical or clever. Nope. It is bloody stupid and it may blow up just like that, in our faces. 

It is all about making choices and assuming them and also not caring too much about DTR or belonging to some freaky box. 

Do I care? 

This is a question that I keep on asking myself. Surely I do. Such a good friend goes with caring, it's almost mandatory. The rest? Perfectly clear I guess. I know. 

I just need to keep on feeling this way, keep on not getting emotionally involved.

If I play my part well. Then no problem. 

We will just keep on spending time together and do whatever we want to when we want to. 

And eventually each of us will go his own way? 

Let's be rational about that. No other issue. 

This is how this kind of things go. We are way too close for any girlfriend or boyfriend to feel secure in a relationship with any of us. And I mean it, even without the whole weirdo thingy thing. Spending time together like that, keeping in touch this often; that would drive any partner mad and jealous and many other things. 

So we will have to come back to our very beginnings at one point.

Or, our recklessness is going to tare us apart.

Or, we are going to end up together.

But, I don't really want to think about that. Because then I will need to talk about it and then that would surely be explosive somehow with me, June, official Drama queen and queen of the abuse at the same bloody time. ^^ 

Goes well but I'm gonna be abusive as always, being passionate and reckless feels quite good sometimes.

Something else to say? 

That was absolutely amazing and crazy. For me, that is for sure. 

I will surely crave for it and I am pretty sure he knows that already. 

I won't show it though or won't try to show it.